Pre-Op Diet

I knew going into this that there would be some sort of pre-op diet I would have to succumb to. According to the research, your liver can be very fatty if you're overweight. Doing this pre-op 'crash' diet helps you lose fat off your liver quickly, which helps the surgeon reach your stomach and lessens complications during the surgery. (The nurse at my consultation explained that the liver is actually one of the first places in your body that you lose fat, which I didn't know.) My surgeon suggests a loss of at least 10 pounds before surgery. Ten pounds in two weeks. Wowza.

After reading a bunch of bandster blogs, it became apparent that the length and food options on pre-op diets varies widely. Some doctors require two-week diets, some one week, some three days, and some don't require a pre-op diet at all! (Lucky freaking ducks!)

Some diets allow for a Slim-Fast type plan of two shakes and a 'sensible' dinner. I've read about some 3 day diets that allow nothing but clear liquids for three days. (Sounds super fun!) My prescribed diet is somewhere in between. While I'm not thrilled, I knew that this was part of the deal, and it could definitely be worse.

Where do I find a holey spoon like that?

The Rules:

• Start two weeks before surgery. (For me, that means October 24th.)
• Maximum of 800 calories per day. (The sausage biscuit I get at McDonald's for breakfast some mornings is more than half of that calorie requirement! Peace out, buttery yumminess!)
• Minimum of 64 grams of protein per day. 
• 4/5 Protein shakes per day, any flavor, any brand. Any fruit, additives or milk I mix in have to be counted toward the 800 calorie limit.
• 1 cup of broth, low-fat broth-based soups, or 98% fat free cream soups without pasta.
• 1 cup of certain salad veggies (lettuce, cucumber, carrots, onions) with certain fat free dressings (any brand of FF Italian or Ranch, Maple Grove Farms Sugar-Free Raspberry Vinaigrette, SF/FF Balsamic Vinaigrette, FF Greek) (2 tbs)
• 1/2 cup of certain raw veggies (carrots, celery, cucumber, broccoli, tomato.)
• Sugar free Italian Ice or Sugar free Popsicles.
• Sugar free Jell-o.
• Water, coffee (yuck!), tea (yuck!) and other sugar free beverages are allowed. 

This is going to be so freaking hard. You don't get to 270 pounds by harboring a secret love for vegetables. However, I originally thought I was only going to be allowed protein shakes, so I'm taking the soups and veggies and sugar free Jell-o (which I already eat and LOVE, btw) and I'm going to make the best of it. 

I'm kind of looking at the two week diet as the first challenge in this long obstacle course of being banded. Can I make it through this? If I can, then everything else shouldn't be too hard. And I'll be able to look back and say, "Hey, remember when you subsisted on protein shakes and lettuce for two weeks? If you can do that, you can do anything!"

Okay, fellow bandsters. Help a girl out. Protein shake suggestions? I really have no idea which way to go on those! And what was your pre-op diet like? Was it the hardest thing you've ever done? Help!