Monday, November 19, 2012

Oh, Hell.

I'm officially 12 days out from surgery, and this weekend, I made it to that lovely milestone called Bandster Hell. And let me tell you - y'all weren't lying.

I. Am. HAUNgry. (That's how my southern Mama pronounces it, all Paula Deen-like.)

This part just seriously sucks. To go from eating whatever you want, to 800 calorie diet, to liquid diet but not really feeling like eating, to soft and mushies, to OHMYGODEATALLTHEFOOD! It's seriously messing with my head.

And I totally admit to "testing" my band and eating some things that are definitely not defined as either soft OR mushy. So far, everything has gone down fine. I am really really working on eating slowly and remembering to chew, chew, chew. If there's something I'm doing well, I think it's that. I am chewing the eff out of this stuff. I do find myself (even with soft and mushies) feeling a sort of pressure in my chest after a bit of eating. Is that a bandster thing? Or a hiatal hernia fix thing? Enlighten me, please.

As of this morning, I have gained weight. And even though they told me that might happen and it's par for the course until you get your fills going, it's completely disheartening. I understand WHY I've gained. I went from eating 350 calories MAX on my liquids week to eating WAY more than 350 calories this weekend. I get the math, but it doesn't make it any easier to accept.

I'm making a seriously concerted effort at work today. I had a protein shake for breakfast, but I'm finding that they only keep me full until about 10 am, so I brought some sugar free Jello to snack on. I brought soft and mushies for lunch, and I'm trying really hard to remember lots of water.

Only 18 days until my first fill. Only 18 days until my first fill. Only 18 days until my first fill.

Ugh.

6 comments:

jennxaz said...

hang in there! That pressure in your chest means slow down or stop eating. You will continue to get those. I call them soft stops...your body telling you, you are getting full. It could also be a little gas too but I would stop eating when you start to feel those...it only gets worse if you continue to eat.

Karen Mary Butterfly said...

You can do it...you've come this far. It's something you obviously really want. I am behind. You'll be so proud when you get through it. Try to focus on the bigger picture and keep your eye on the prize!!

Connie O said...

I found that the hunger calmed down a bit after the first week or so. I did boost my calorie intake a bit, but I'm keeping it under 1,500 most days (sometimes more like 1,200), so after jumping up a few lbs., my weight held steady for a week and then started creeping down again. I don't know if you'll have the same experience, of course!

I recommend starting the day with something denser than a protein shake. After the fill, I know some people rely on protein shakes in the a.m. because they are tighter then, but that doesn't work during bandster hell! When I eat a scrambled egg with an ounce or two of refried beans, it keeps me full for a long time.

adorkbl said...

Hang in there and listen to those soft stop signals. :)

Lap Band Gal said...

Hang in there. You can do it :)

Holly Rose said...

I know how hard this is but I know you can do it!! My brother has the band and has been very successful with it. I am sure you will be too!!